Friday, March 25, 2016

CER: Monster Templates - Haunted Cake! Cake Powers! And Encounter Punter Bundt!

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Today's my birthday, so let's be wacky. Cake monsters! Puns! I mean, this stuff writes itself, probably!
Let's see what we can come up with!

Cake Template

Now, to make a Racial template for a cake, we need to focus on only the things that make a cake a cake.
I've not templated a Racial template yet, so now is a good chance.


44 points
Advantages:  Doesn’t Breathe [20]; Doesn’t Eat or Drink [10]; Doesn’t Sleep [20]; Immunity to Metabolic Hazards [30]; Immunity to Mind Control [15]; Indomitable [15];  Injury Tolerance(Homogeneous, No Blood) [45]; Unfazeable [15]
Disadvantages:  No Manipulators [-50]; No Legs (Sessile) [-50]; Social Stigma (Valuable Property) [-10]
Quirks:  Tastes Delicious[-1]
Tastes Salty!

Delicious cakes are the most common variety of cake, but that doesn't preclude someone from making a cake you don't like. In that case, buy off the Tastes Delicious quirk.

Typical Cake Powers

We are talking about birthday cakes. So, the first burning damage attack is of course

Sixteen Candles (+140%): Innate Attack (Burning) 1 (Candle Power -10%; Rate of Fire, 16, +150%) [12]
Ha ha, are you offended?
It is a picture of a horse from
a children's cartoon.
This ability is limited by the power of a birthday cake's candles. If candles are doused, or the cake can't support keeping all of its candles lit, Rate of Fire drops. Note, that RoF 16 gives a +3 bonus to skill.

How about an ability that represents celebratory pomp and circumstance? Deafen everyone close to the cannon, and confuse everyone at the target location where you fire it.

Party Cannon (+70%): Obscure 5 (Audio/Visual) (Merriment Power -10%; Extended, Two Senses, +20%; Ranged +50%, Link, +10%) [17]

Party Cannon Concussion (+200%): Affliction 1 (Merriment Power -10%; Emanation -20%, Area Effect, 4 yards, +100%; Malediction, +100%; Link, +10%; Disadvantage,  Deafness, +20%) [30]

This ability depends on the saturation of latent merriment in the environment, in areas with high or very high merriment, Add additional levels of obscure, in areas with low merriment or no merriment, the loud fog horns have no aerosol to power them, and blinding confetti falls too fast to have an impact. Twisted Merriment might produce schadenfreude-inducing effects, like papercuts for everyone, or confetti getting stuck in clothes and making people itchy.

Quick Set-Up Fondant (+120%): Binding 12  (Sugar Power, -10%; Engulfing, +60%; Sticky, +10%; Selectivity, +10%, Area Effect, 2 yards, +50%) [53]

Shooting frosting all over! Selectivity means one can use the sticky shot to goo up the environment, or the engulfing shot to slime a specific target. The power modifier requires an obedience to a pact to remain sweet through thick and thin and do one's best to proliferate the message of frosting and fondant as best as one is able. For a cake, this is difficult, so most are already doing their earnest best by existing. A cake will typically spray frosting in layers to increase the cumulative binding.

Typical Birthday Cake Encounter

Now, I am not trying to blow any minds or rock any boats here, so I'm gonna stick with a birthday cake as one would be accustomed to encountering in Greek or Norse mythos.

First off, let's take a look at the CER of the cake template by itself. The template gives 18 points to the DR section, sets Move to -6, and 8 to Will. This means it starts off with a CER of 20, and goes up from there.

If we use the powers we set up, the affliction value is 12 because the binding is the strongest move. Let's see what we are working with so far.
Attack Skill0Active Defense0
Affliction12Damage Resistance18
Fatigue Points0Hit Points0
Total Offensive Rating (OR)6Total Protective Rating (PR)26 

OK, let's give it some DR in the form of fondant. Fondant is a tough skin, and 3 DR is worth 2 points in the DR section.
Attack Skill0Active Defense0
Affliction12Damage Resistance20
Fatigue Points0Hit Points0
Total Offensive Rating (OR)6Total Protective Rating (PR)28 

Let's add a bunch of hit points, and the Sixteen Candles attack. We want it to be able to hit, so let's give it a skill level of 15, but mind the high RoF, and the +3 to skill from that.
Attack Skill13Active Defense0
Affliction12Damage Resistance20
Fatigue Points0Hit Points10
Total Offensive Rating (OR)30Total Protective Rating (PR)38 

And, since I've been keeping this too serious up until now, let's add a weakness to this cake. It is weak against anyone with the Improvised Weapon (Kitchenware) perk, this manifests more as a limitation on DR and Homogeneous... I'm gonna eyeball it as being worth about -5% to the DR and Homogeneous, meaning it lowers the Damage Resistance score by 1, and now we are done.
Attack Skill13Active Defense0
Affliction12Damage Resistance19
Fatigue Points0Hit Points10
Total Offensive Rating (OR)30Total Protective Rating (PR)37 

Let's convert that to stats.

Punter Bundt
ST: 10HP: 20Speed: 5
DX: 10Will: 10Move: 0
IQ: 4Per: 10
HT: 10FP: 10SM: +1
Dodge: 8Parry: N/ADR: 3 (Tough Skin)
Sixteen Candles(15): 1/2D 10, Max 100, Acc 3, RoF 16, 1d Burning. Normally gets the +3 from high RoF. Firing balls of fire at target from each candle. A candle can be hit at a -8 to skill lowering Rate of Fire by one. Each candle is crippled and destroyed with 1 HP of damage
Party Cannon(15): 1/2D -, Max 100, Acc 3, RoF 1. Launches foghorns, smoke, and glitter at a target. This gives a -5 where sound and vision are concerned, as if Obscure 5. As a linked effect, everyone within 2 yards of the cake must roll a quick contest of skill 15 versus HT, or be deafened for minutes equal to margin of failure.
Quick Set-Up Fondant(15): 1/2D -, Max 100, Acc 3, RoF 1. Can either make 2 yard blobs of fondant traps on the ground with binding strength of 12, or shoot a target directly to engulf them in a ST 12 binding.
Traits: Cake Meta-Trait, Weakness (Kitchen Knives),
Class: Construct
Notes: Tastes really good. The Weakness to Kitchen Knives means that an Innkeeper can pierce the Fondant DR (Effectively 0 DR against Kitchen Knives) while doing double damage! When extracting cake using a Surgery roll, kitchenware counts as very fine equipment. Usually guards presents for greedy wizards. Allow rolls on the treasure table from Dungeon Fantasy 8. Items gained this way must have a minimum of 1 enchantment, and if you like, a curse.

Other Notes and Closing

GURPS-wise, I got a bunch of stuff this year. My girlfriend got me some Legos earlier to use as figures, and my brother got me a few pyramids that I wanted (Alt Dungeons, and Alt GURPS II and IV) but I had to cancel the session for tomorrow. Thinking of following this article up with a dreadfully serious Five Room Dungeon on the themes of birthdays.


  1. Great post. But most importantly - happy birthday!

    Looking forward to the Five-Room Birthday dungeon, too...


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